In these past few weeks I have tried new things, met new people, and exposed myself to new situations. And the whole time I have been wondering 'What is all this for'. The answer still escapes me. Even now I still ponder on it but I feel as if I have gotten some of my soul back while searching for the answer. Everything one does in life is for one main purpose, and that is to love life and the people around you with all your heart. While at the same time, hoping with all of your being that one day that other half of you will walk into the room and light up your life.
I had forgotton that. I had been empty and cold, numb, to laughter, kindness, and hope until I found this gracious clearing of my soul.
I sit here knowing my time has not yet come to find that light of my life. And that gives me hope. For now i know that he has not passed me by. He may already be in my life, yet without my knowledge. Or he maybe someone i meet in the far future. But until the time comes that I find the other half of my soul I will continue to learn. I will continues to love. And i will continue to be a hopeless romantic reading books and watching romantic movies while i cry into pillow. I will admit that sometimes my dreams run away with my heart. But how can one help it in such a numbingly pessimistic world. Sometimes my dreams are the only thing that keep me here.
And here i shall stay until I know I am worthy of the man that was made for me. Forever if necessary.
I will weep
yes
but I will weep for the fact that I am not ready
it is much more the incentive to wake up and be a better woman when i know that the sooner i grow, the sooner i will be complete in all aspects.
And that is the blessing that has been bestowed on me the past few weeks.
I don't know how to repay the heavens other than walking the path that they have laid in front of me. No stone can stop my travels. No storm can impede my voyage. No amount of doubt can stop my fate. Only my decisions can determine my destiny...
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