Alright Here we go. I'm sick, miss Kat, Maintenance, and un-needed bullshit is being kept going cause that person needs to put someone else down so he feels better about himself. I have my faults yes, I'm willing to admit them. I have accepted and embraced them. Also their consequence's. I have done that and it has taken me a hell of a long time to do that.
Now i admit also that I could have done things differently in the past. But hind sight is twenty twenty and one person can only do so much to make the world happy. Now I am being shut out and put on trial for something that doesn't even need to be gone to court for.
People can be so bitter about something that subconsciously their new life goal is to make others miserable. And to put themselves so high on a pedestal that they cant even find their own ass. Which is coincidentally where there head is. So it basically comes down to a huge ball of prick floating around in the middle of the sky looking for a non-existent pedestal. I know, kinda graphic.
Moving on...
And I digress...
Basically what everything comes down to is I made a decision that made someone else unhappy and now they are trying to get their revenge. But here is the kicker! I was going to eventually make that decision anyways. So this was bound to happen. I could never escape it. So why am i trying to fight it? Let him be mad. Let me be hated. I will take the fall of being the bad person this time and most likely the next, Cause i know in my heart that i am not this bad person that everyone says i am. I have found light and happiness in my life by making this decision. A smile has come to my soul that I never thought would shine again. If I have to be the evil witch of the west to be happy, i will, gladly. And no amount of guilt trip will change my mind and my decision.
2 comments:
And thus the disadvantage to when the communication barrier breaks down makes itself apparant. Look love I am genuinly not bitter... what you read on my blogs... well my blogs are a place to clear out some of my hardest thoughts and feelings. I wish you would actually talk to me about it all because I do try and be genuinly happy for you as it stands now your profile is set so only friends can contact you... so you removed my only way to communicate with you at the moment. (phone lost) Anyway... I am not bitter or mad with you. I genuinly am trying to be friendly with you but seem to be shut down at every turn. I wrote a blog one more time on myspace... intended to be my final word and demonstrate my feelings on the matter. I hope it clears it up... not for my sake but for yours.
Pssst...Lauren? From Kon last year? :-P Been trying to get ahold of you. Drop me a message on AIM (Spikey206).
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