G I Joe

As I lay here in the dying snow
I see a light from above
and it burns like fire
It promises passion
and pain
Either one I would gladly take
For holding his hand
in the desert sun
I know would be worth
all the life times
I could ever
achieve.

Humbled

Currently in class and this weird feeling has taken a hold of me. Its peaceful, depressing, lonely, and humbled. How does that make sense? it doesn't. I fear a loss of a new friend. And that loss will hurt me more than anything else short of me losing my daughter. I cried today for him when he left my arms. I don't cry, I never cry. I learned a long time ago that there isn't a good enough reason for me to shed a tear. A calm has come over me sense I met him. An understanding if you will. I hate writing about my happy feeling because they seem so cheapened by words. But this man just makes me want to write everything down to remember. The reason why I want to remember is becasue I have a feeling he is going to be ripped from me one day. He will be deployed soon. Im a very dangerous field. This morning when he walked out of my house I felt like I was letting the love of my life walk away from me forever.

I have alot more on my mind than I am able to type right now. BUt this short paragraph has helped me significantly